Lately I have been really upset with abortion. Well, more upset than usual that is. On the night of the election I went to bed so upset. I couldn't really explain it. The only thing I could pinpoint was that I was really upset over abortion. It just made me SO MAD. For every choice in this life is there is a consequence. Some are good and some are bad, depending on the choice. You make a mistake, you pay the consequence. You cheat, you get caught. You break the law, you pay the penalty. So why in the case of.. you have sex and accidentally get pregnant, it's Oh that's ok, you can just kill the unwanted baby. HUH? How did this happen? How did our society reach this point? It is wrong. wrong. wrong.
I understand that there are circumstances here (rape, incest, life-threatening to the mother), so I'm not talking about that. But even then, I'm sure that decision would be torture. Why would a woman ever make this decision just to rid herself of a mistake? And doesn't she know that she will never be the same? That she is making an even bigger mistake? I don't understand.
I cannot have children. Kirk and I ache with all of our hearts and souls to have a family. That is no exaggeration. And there are those out there who are KILLING theirs. And it's LEGAL. I can't even begin to explain how unfair that is. It breaks my heart, thoroughly.
9 comments:
It breaks my heart as well. It's disgusting! I cannot even comprehend how much greater the devastation feels to you. I cannot imagine the consequences they will have to face in the future. It's hard to make heads or tails of Heavenly Father's plan sometimes! Regardless, there is a plan, and eventually everhone WILL face the consequences that they dodged. It's SO SAD!
Heather, you and Kirk are grieving. You are grieving for the life you were taught to expect and the life you want desperately. And a part of grief is rage. A lot of people direct that rage at God, but we, with our understanding of the Plan of Salvation, realize we signed up for this, even if we don't remember doing so. My own personal, non-doctrinal opinion is that we had a very good idea of what we would be signing up for and that we jumped at the chance because we knew it would be worth it. But back to my point, grief has a rage component and we can't direct it at God and we know it is destructive to direct it at someone. So we direct it at a thing. A thing that is related to our grief.
You have every right to be angry, Heather! I am angry with you and for you. Please call for some blubbering if you need it, hermana! I sure wish that I had the magic words and end all to this trial for you. I sure do love you...if that helps at all.
You may not know this, but in 1977 I was at a state woman's conference in Ellensburg with 4000 women, 2000 we pro aboration and 2000 against and I was able to speak. I have always been glad that I was there and I felt that this was the same war that was waged in the pre-existance and that those of us who are valiant fought the war valiantly there also. We may not be able to stop it, but we can speak out against it! It is as bad as the Holicoust.
I totally agree with your stance, Heather. It seems like such an obviously wrong choice that it is astounding that it happens so often. I recently learned that an estimated 10,000 abortions were performed last year in my state.
The previous comment by scully seemed to link what you are going through with your anger or "rage" as she put it. While your situation probably brings more focus to this issue, I don't believe anger has to be justified or explained by grief.
Abortion kills babies. Anger is justified by that alone.
Amen, Kristi! We do not need to like this!
I empathize, it is esp wrong and hard when people would love to have those babies! Life is hard! I wish the kids a my high school who home-abort with drugs ect., would have the foresight and perspective to realize what they are really doing--I just think they aren't very rational, and society is telling them it is okay.
I agree with what everyone says. Especially you. I'm so sorry for your situtation. It's a blessing and a curse sometimes to be given the trials we are given. I really hope you guys can at least adopt to support those mothers who decide the other choice than abortion. I wish I could have your baby for you-be your "Baby Mamma" I would totally do that for you.
Heather,
My name is Karen Strong. You don't know me. My sister is Anne Tobler Taylor's mom. She was reading your blog and wanted me to respond to it because I have adopted three children. She was really touched by your blog and your desire to have children. I live in Utah, also. I got all of my children through "word of mouth"...friends of friends that knew a pregnant girl. It seems to me that you guys are doing the right thing by being open with your desire to adopt. Getting the word out it imperative. We were able to get all three of our children very inexpensively, also. If you get to the point where you actually are going to get a baby through "word of mouth" and not through LDS social services, then ask Anne how to contact me, because I have a great connection to a social worker that can do it for you affordably. My children only cost me $2,000 - 3,000 ...which is unheard of (plus I was reimbursed 90% through my insurance). I also have a sister-in-law that adopted four children by "word-of-mouth", too. Just remember, the Lord really is mindful of you and he will hear your prayers...it's just always on his timetable and it's so frustrating because you have absolutely no control or no knowledge that it will be answered in the way that you desire. But, I am convinced that He will send you the spirits that are intended to be part of your family. It's an incredibly hard test, that only those that have been through really understand. Hopefully LDS social services will by your answer...but don't hesitate to contact me if other doors open and you need help knowing what to do.
Karen Strong
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